No More Mr. Fat Guy!

Most tomatoes you buy at the store look nice, but don’t taste very good. Especially in winter. So one Florida grower bred his own version of tomatoes that still taste good even after being shipped hundreds of miles. Customers swear that they taste much better than ordinary tomatoes. And they’re willing to pay twice as much for them as they pay for regular tomatoes. But they don’t look so hot; in fact, they’re marketed as UglyRipe Tomatoes. But you can’t buy them anymore, thanks to the Florida Tomato Committee. They have the power to determine which Florida tomatoes can be sold and which can’t. And they’ve decided that UglyRipe tomatoes are, well, too ugly to be allowed to be sold, no matter how many people want to buy them.

Oh, well. At least we still live in the freest country on the planet, where you’re allowed to burn the flag, cable and satellite companies provide hard core porn 24/7, and our government allows all kinds of genetically modified Frankenfoods on the market, while protecting us from less than aesthetically perfect natural produce.

And I’m proud to be an American, where at least I know I’m free!

Update: I didn’t notice until after posting that the story was three years old. So I Googled around and found out that in January of this year, after a three year battle, the USDA finally granted UglyRipe tomatoes an exemption. So the ugly tomatoes are free at last!

That’s what the scale at the Patrick Wellness Center in Fayetteville says. That’s the gym where I walk. I just got back from another 2.5 hour walk. That’s a total of seven hours walking since Sunday. I did an hour and a half, then took a break. Unfortunately, the water at the gym was shut off for repairs, so instead of rehydrating with H2O, I had little choice but to buy a can of pop. But that’s OK; that’s only two pops so far this week, and I haven’t had an A&W root beer in quite a while. So I had the pop, stepped outside and smoked a cigarette (yep, I’m still cool!), and got back to it. Did another hour, and then headed home.

And boy, am I starving. I had a cantaloupe this morning, and 24 ounces of goat milk. I’m trying to eat more fruits and veggies, and Dollar General had some cantaloupes that are a little past their prime for fifty cents each. I picked out two that were still nice and firm, and I’ll have the other one tomorrow. I mix in this health drink called Rice and Shine with the goat milk, along with some peanut butter to make it more filling. It’s actually pretty good. But after a 150 minute power walk, I’m famished. So I’m having some goat meat chili, courtesy of two male goats I took to the butcher a couple months ago.

Back at it tomorrow. Same Fat Time, Same Fat Channel!

Only about a third of Americans eat at least two servings of fruits and three servings of vegetables a day.

And two thirds of Americans are overweight, obese, or morbidly obese.

Gosh, what a strange coincidence!